Thank the Lord we all survived this miserable season. Finale was par for the course in my mind. I was a little nervous at the end they were going to throw us a curve ball with Ben, but low and behold, the bitch has some taste and went with the only one worth looking at- JP. I give them a few months before JP comes to his senses and realizes that Ashley is as insecure and clueless as he thought in Fiji.
So that was a lot of freaking footage in just 24 hours. Started with the Men Tell All which wasn't really much at all. First of all- another cut out dress- gross, I'm over it. Secondly, really would have liked to have seen Bentley represent himself. I mean what could anyone say- he was a total asshole? Correct. So no drama there. I was really thrown off by the fact that ABC felt so defensive of choosing Ashley as the Bachelorette. Was it necessary to bring out 3 previous Bachelors/Bachelorettes to defend "just how difficult it is" to be in that position? Honestly, I don't want to hear it. This show initially started with the concept that even though it's one guy and 25 girls, it's not all that unlike real life (aside from the elaborate dates). Everyone is always trading up and you don't have to be exclusive with someone until you determine that you do. So to act now like this role is so damn difficult is just annoying to me. I don't want to watch this bitch date 25 guys that are selected based upon her requests and ideals and feel sorry for her. You are doing what every other single person is doing to meet "the one" except you get everything paid for including your clothing, housing and a stipend. Poor you? Really? You had to tell someone goodbye at the end of the date? Um, that's life. You don't marry them all. Poor you, you got played. Hey anyone else out there date an asshole? Pretty much can guarantee we have all dated one and all been one to someone. That's life. I really don't feel sorry for her in any shape or form.
Onto the finale- Was it me or did they seriously lack in showcasing Fiji? I thought it didn't look that great. I mean the mud bath date? Really? I kept picturing that scene from the movie Stand by Me with the leaches. Gross. Also it looked like a sweltering humidity filled island to me. No thanks. (side note- I realize Fiji is flippin awesome. I'm merely pointing out this is what they chose for footage). Did anyone else crack up at her family and the use of sweat rags? Seriously ABC? Give the bitches a little shade. Maybe a fan. Shit- i was freakin' sweating just watching this shit. Another point of distraction would be Ben F's apparel. So you fell in love and decided that this would be a good time to really get in touch with your inner stylist? Umm he should really reconsider this if his style consists of neon with a hat that was made for a 5 year old boy. That was just hard to watch. I think he must have got his hands on an American Apparel catalogue and maybe a little shot of tequila for the courage to wear it.
A few other fascinating points- Ashley's sister. Wow Kat Von D's twin sister! What a frickin bitch- I'm with Ashley on this one. Get a grip. You don't have to marry him lady. Why care so much? Carrie and James did a little research on Chrystie (can't stand how she spells that) and it turns out she is a bit of a fame whore herself. She is on the show Extreme Couponers. Perhaps this was her ploy to get a little air time- suppose it worked. I found it ironic she referred to herself as the "rational" one as I'm staring at her Geisha girl tattoo. In what way was she referring to Ashley as being irrational? Hmm. Also found her brother hysterical. I think he was hungover in every shot. But if I were him I would be too. Shit he gets to go all the way to Fiji to discuss his older sister's love life. I'd be hitting the local bars as well.
My big complaint at the end was that Ashley allowed both men to get down on one knee and propose. Even if the producers suggested this or even insisted on letting it happen- you should have been better than that. Have a little fucking decency Ash. Again- she makes it impossible to feel any empathy for her. In addition- I would have much preferred her dress to be strapless.
And finally- After the Final Rose. Well I really f'ed this up. I thought it was recording and when I finally caught up on the DVR I realized I missed a full 40 minutes. I have a feeling that it wasn't really missing much though. So please fill me in- what happened with Constantine and Ben F? Did they say anything interesting or worthwhile?
One final thought- Chris Harrison you look much better with the darker hair. Good choice.
So who's watching Bachelor Pad? I'm sure I'll tune in since there isn't much else on. But I'm really not into these spares. Jake and Vienna? Kasey? Gia again? And Ames, really, why are you doing this show????
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