Bachelor Recap- Brad oh who gives a f&c$?

Well I have to admit I was more than skeptical at the very idea of bringing back Brad. I was, like most women, pissed that he left two women at the "podium" as he calls it. A whole season of waste- couldn't he date for a month, hit the cover of a few gossip mags and break up with her like the rest of these bastards do. I was also irritated at his slow speech- a little overplayed country boy if you ask me. On the other hand, I've had more than a few good times at one of the bars he owns on 6th street and he isn't terrible to look at. I also figured the producers have a contract out on his testicles if he doesn't propose at the end of this season.

I have to say I was more than entertained at tonight's episode. I missed the first 20 minutes, but thanks to Traci I'm pretty much filled in. I think I'll break this down with bullet points.
* Brad- Ok enough with the humble douchebag act. We get it, you have daddy issues. You've changed. Therapy worked. You want to be happy. Riiiight. I was more than irritated with his "it's ok to hate me, just let me explain" attitude follow by 5 minutes of precious airtime complaining he was so "beat up" by the ladies. I think I see the writing on the wall- it's called "damage control" and it comes from an expensive publicist who is telling you how to be likable. My suggestion- fire your publicist. Get real. Own up to it- you didnt love the chicks. You want a re-do to see if you can trade up a bit. Go for it bro. We'll see if you man up this season.
* Chantal O- (Ok i'm a little rough on the names tonight so forgive if im a bit off- there were 30 of them)- Loved that she slapped him. Somehow, I think that played itself out ok. Normally I'm cringing when they meet for the first time and try to stand out from one another. Something about how hard she slapped made her likable.
* Madison- really? So Brad, you really want to be married and have a family so you select the chick with fangs? hmmm... this is what I call a producer pick. Brad picks the first 12 or so and they throw in a few for candy.
* Michelle- Traci you hit it on the head- Why are all the Michelle's the crazy ones? This one looks like she will produce some interesting episodes. What is her "secret" she has to tell Brad before he proposes? I'm super curious but I'm sure it's something like, "I've had 4 boob jobs".
* Emily- Sweet as pudding. Agree with Traci on this one as well- so want to hate her for her perfect appearance but she's so damn darling I want to be her BFF. (Dont worry traci I wouldnt cheat on you that easy). I'm thinking she may be the commitment phobe one.
* Sarah P- This girl wasn't on camera too much but I sure did like her. She's spunky and totally reminds me of Ashley Frankston. Just fun fun fun and sassy. We'll see if she holds up to her look a like!
*Meghan- Well interesting fact here- she went to HS with my bestie, Ali. Thought her pink shoes were ugly as sin but a clever way to stand out. Not sure why she took them off once she was in the house. Would have liked her to be a bit more confident with them. Ali- what's the dirt on her?
* Jackie- well this one looks like a loose cannon to me. Loved her yellow dress though- super cute on her skin tone. Lord knows, my pale ass could never pull it off.
* That little chick from Kansas- don't know your name sweetheart but sure did love your ruby slippers- clever clever. It's the year of the shoe I suppose. I completely agree with Traci here- it was perfect for standing out till she ruined it by saying "there's no place like home and I can't wait to take you home to meet my family". Wow- dude you just introduced yourself. The Kansas was enough connection for the shoes. I just want to edit these girls sometimes.
* Brit- wonder if she had Brad walk her back out to the car- haha.

Well that's all I can remember for now. It was a good opening. I'm anxious for next weeks episode. What are your thoughts?